[AKidsRight.Org] Praying for help in Family Law Reform? / Popular Blog / Your FEEDBACK

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From: John Murtari (jmurtari@akidsright.org)
Date: Fri Oct 13 2006 - 14:59:54 EDT

Good People & People of Faith,

This message contains info on:
1. Current News - Murtari Update
2. A moment to vote, a lifetime of change
3. Praying for reform

1. Current News - Murtari Update
Today makes the 75th day without solid food in John Murtari's jail
sentence.  His tube feedings continue and he's in good condition.  His
Court appearance for an immediate release is scheduled for next
Wednesday, October 18th.  John certainly hopes to be set free and
thanks all of you that wrote to the judge recently on his behalf.  He
looks forward to going home and seeing his son, but is also ready to
continue his efforts until December 1st if he is not released early.
For more details, see http://www.AKidsRight.Org/support_jm.htm.

2. A moment to vote, a lifetime of change
Teri Stoddard here.

My recent article, "John Murtari, Criminal or Loving
was chosen as an Editor's Top Pick and is now a Featured Article under
News on Associated Content.  Please take a moment to visit this site
and vote for my articles. Doing this will help me get recognition for
my work and as well as furthering the cause.

A little way down the page on the left hand side you will see this:
More by Teri Stoddard
This will take you to my other published articles. Please, if you can,
vote for and/or link to them.  If you have a web site, please add my
RSS feed.

I'm especially proud of Is He "the loser" or is he "Dad"? and It's Not
Your Mother's Fathers Movement Anymore.

Thanks for taking the time to read this and vote. I really appreciate
it.  The more people who read our work the more likely we are to force

Keep fighting, we *are* making a difference.


3. Praying for reform
What about belief in God?  What is the role of prayer in reform?  An
uncomfortable topic for a lot of people, including me.  People contact
me and say, "John, I like your messages and ideas, but can you get rid
of the Faith & God stuff.  A lot of people don't believe and it's a
distraction."  What about prayer?  Here are some thoughts and as
always your FEEDBACK is welcome.

The Group AKidsRight.Org is a collection of Moms & Dads trying to
follow NonViolent Action as demonstrated by Gandhi & King.  Please
read more details at: http://www.AKidsRight.Org/civil_back.htm.

Faith and prayer were certainly foundations of those efforts.  What
about ours?

Do you pray to God for reform?
It's a simple question.  My answer is no, not at all, until I started
working on this message.  I don't know about you, but I surprised

I like to think I pray often, but praying for God's help in our reform
effort never crossed my mind.  Does that make any sense?

Divine Nature
What we pray for and whether we pray at all depends on how we see
God.  Many see God as a mystical force, the source of natural & moral
law, the first cause.  There is something there, a spiritual force --
but it doesn't/can't care about each and every one of us through out
the universe.  It doesn't respond to our special requests.

Others (and I count myself in this group) have a more traditional
view.  A loving God that cares and responds to each and every one of
us.  This was certainly the God described by Jesus of Nazareth.

I'm still awed by the literal translation of the first words in the
"Our Father" -- that is not what he said.  The original word was
"Abba," which is how a child addressed a parent, literally: Daddy!

Certainly an intimate, caring, and responsive relationship.  In his
teachings Jesus emphasized this concept over and over again.  He took
that belief all the way to the Cross.  I try to share that same belief
as I call myself a Christian.

Divine Justice
Wow, what about that?  I don't pray to God for lower taxes or gas
prices for all.  But a Civil Right, an idea that reflects directly on
our dignity and worth as human beings made in God's image -- worth
praying for all?

Certainly many Blacks prayed for the end of segregation.  Their
churches were filled with calls for help.  I'm sure those sentiments
were repeated in their individual prayers at home.

What about our dignity as parents to our own children?  Our great
Civil Right to be a parent to our own kids.  Isn't that part of the
natural law and Divine justice?  Shouldn't we pray with the same

Divine Action
Doesn't this start to change our attitude regarding reform?  Doesn't
it help change the question of "if reform will happen" to "when reform
will happen."

Doesn't it help change the question of "what can one person do" to
"what can one person not do" -- what can God not accomplish?

What goes hand-in-hand with Divine action, our actions based on
Faith.  That our thoughts, words, and actions become consistent with
our Faith in God's help.  That we are willing to take the leap of
Faith confident we will land safely on the other side.

A prayer for Family Rights
Almighty and ever-living God, hear our prayer for justice. Give us the
courage and Faith we need to meet the challenges of reform.  Help all
people recognize the right of parents to be secure and treated equally
in the ability to love their children.  Inspire us to follow your
example of divine love not only for our children, but for all our
brothers and sisters.  Amen.


--- Stephen Patrick <stephendpatrick@yahoo.com>

> This is fantastic news which gives hope. Please tell John and his
> son, Domenic, that I am sorry that he is there, moreover, that I am
> so sorry that he and his son can not be together developing the
> obvious bond which they both share.

> I sense sparkles of hope and a day of promise. Please share this
> with John for me.

--- Doug DeMoss <Ddsd1104@aol.com>

> I am scheduled to go on trial for this very issue the day before
> John has his hearing.  I wish him the best as we all strive to
> change this system. I face 7 yrs if convicted, not months.

> The facts in my case are as appalling if not worse than John's.
> I feel his pain everyday as my day grows closer, with the
> length of this ordeal and the costs involved I also know of his
> plight to gain himself aid.

> There is no justice in this system where child support is at
> question. I have not been under an order of support since
> 1993 yet I stand to lose 7 years of my life to this
> corruption. One can only hope people will continue to fight
> for justice.

> The corruption in my case runs deep and far and it is clear as
> crystal, yet because only a few will be brave and fight. We
> are losing.  If unity truly existed these cases would not go
> this far.

> Another father denied the right to be a parent, but to be a
> wallet

--- <vintage00gypsy@yahoo.com>

> I recieve updates on John's case in my email account. I appreciate
> everything that he is doing for us as parents.

> My husband has been fighting for his son for the last ten years. The
> child support is out of this world. The child's mother has an
> agreement with the custodial maternal grandmother that she only has
> to pay 50 a month but yet the grandmother is pressing my husband for
> more and more and claiming that he is the reason they are
> 'suffering'... What gets me us that the child goes to a private
> school, sees every new movie in the theater before having it
> purchased for home use on dvd, has the newest game stations and all
> the toys in the world... How is that suffering? The child has been
> told so many negative things about his father that he doesn't want
> anything to do with him anymore- it breaks my husband's heart. We
> were appointed a 'mediator' who has been anything BUT and has torn
> us apart for saying we don't agree with the way he is being raised
> (R rated films regularly, no chores, rules, etc.) and instead of
> understanding we were told that it doesn't hurt a ten year old child
> to watch R rated films now and then and that the child doesn't
> 'want' to spend time with his father... (of course a spoiled ten
> year old doesn't want to go somewhere where rules are enforced, does
> it take a rocket scientist to figure that out?) WHO HAS THE RIGHT TO

> I do not want this kind of thing to happen to another father, or
> family for that matter! I stand behind John 100% and will keep
> spreading the information and story to as many people as I can. If
> there is ANYTHING more I can do, just give me the word.


--- Teri Stoddard <teri@AKidsRight.Org>

> Letter to Judge Hedges:

> October 12, 2006

> Honorable Judge Bryan Hedges
> Onondaga County Family Court
> 401 Montgomery Street
> Syracuse, NY 13202

> Dear Judge Hedges:

> Subject: John Murtari

> I realize you are a busy man. I know that you see many cases in your
> courthouse each day, as do most judges across the country. Try as
> you might, it's not humanly possible to know enough about each case
> in the limited time you have with parents to get it right every
> time. I'm writing because I believe you got it wrong in the Murtari
> case.

> I should start by telling you that I acknowledge there are parents
> who run from their responsibilities. I have ex-husbands who avoided
> paying their child support. One in fact, traded recording radio
> commercials for a local restaurant in exchange for free beer; a move
> I had to believe was done to avoid garnishment. Another never paid a
> dime, even while he was enlisted in the Army, something I hope
> parents no longer get away with.

> John Murtari is nothing like my ex-husbands; he's a responsible man
> and loving father. Unlike my ex-husbands, who also abandoned my
> children emotionally and physically, John Murtari is in jail because
> he chose to remain in his son's life.

> You allowed his ex-wife to move his son across the country, for
> reasons that are dubious. As much as I disagree with your decision,
> I won't address that now. What I will address is the fact that you
> have refused to include his travel expenses when calculating his
> child support. I wonder how you expected him to continue to parent
> his son if he wasn't to see him in person. You certainly can't
> believe a young boy doesn't need his father in his life.

> Mr. Murtari hasn't had solid food since July 31 in protest of your
> sentence. That alone should show you the depth of his love for
> Domenic. His example is sure to teach Domenic the importance of
> standing up for your convictions. You can show Domenic the
> importance of admitting when you're wrong by letting his father go
> free when he asks you for a reduced sentence next week, allowing the
> travel expenses from here forward, and adjusting all arrears. I'd
> ask you to give Mr. Murtari the equal physical custody he and
> Domenic want, but I don't think I'll push my luck.

> Please put yourself in Mr. Murtari's shoes. What would you have done
> with a young son across the country and a dying mother to care for
> in Syracuse? Put yourself in Domenic's shoes, who has made it clear
> he wants more time with his father. Will Domenic come out of this
> hating you, all judges or the family courts, or will he have a new
> respect for you, all judges and the family courts?

> Respectfully,

> Teri Stoddard
> Founder
> Shared Parenting Works

--- A collection of older feedback is listed below:

> 1. Please express my concern for John. Please let him know that I
> completely understand his situation with his son, arrearages and
> monies needed to be used to complete/secure his loving bond with his
> son Domenic. Leave him with my prayers. Stephen Patrick

> 2. For child support as violation of Antipeonage Act:
> http://www.antipeonage.0catch.com.  Keep up the fight John, we love
> you!  Roger Knight

> 3. Every federal circuit court of appeal that has addressed the
> issue has determined that due process prohibits incarceration of an
> indigent defendant in a civil contempt proceeding absent appointment
> of counsel. Regards, Torm Howse

> 4. Our prayers are with you. Please remember the "John" of old as he
> wrote his prison epistles(letters). A lot of us have also been
> falsely imprisoned, we know how you feel. I pray that you will be
> released soon, but remember Saint Paul did a lot of his fighting
> from inside the prison cell chained to a wall. You are our hero
> !!!!! Lord bless thee and keep thee. Tony.Taylor@yahoo.com
> http://www.EqualCustody.com

> 5. [John] embodies the recipient of the greatest injustices of the
> family court "system." Many have analyzed him, supported him,
> criticized him, deified him - and yet I see nothing happening with
> the court's decision. The judges and other politicians, such as
> Senators, in this case have absolutely NO courage to acknowledge
> accountability for the legal decisions made against John.  There
> were and are many errors made in judgment rulings that should be
> reversed... Are we going to permit these people, whom we have
> elected to represent us, rob our children of this basic right while
> we close our eyes?  mom2adozen

> 6. I am sure that whatever people's views on family law, or John's
> campaign objectives, we would all wish that he comes through this
> self imposed ordeal without harming his health too much in the
> process.  Please send him my good wishes if any of you are in
> contact with him, and tell him he has proved his committment beyond
> any reasonable doubt... John may possibly remember me, I'm from the
> UK and perhaps he'll remember our discussions regarding "a child's
> best interests" and what that phrase may mean. GrahamG.

> 7. Please tell John that I have been and will continue to keep him
> in my prayers. shellyhots

> 8. I am terribly sorry to hear of a thing like this happening yet
> again. Although I am in Colorado if there is any way my husband or I
> could help (such as writing a letter, phone calls, etc) please let
> me know. Misty Osmundsen

> 9. I agree that the Family Courts need a total overhaul. I have
> written and published a book exposing the corruption within the
> Rancho Cucamonga Family Law Courts...  The name of the book is
> WITHOUT HONOR.  Every word is the truth and actually happened.  You
> might find it interesting.  Thank you for your time.  Raymond
> A. Henigner

> 10. Your news shared with the grassroots Creativity Broadcasting
> Network in Australia and our Global Village.  Michael Riddell

> 11. I wish you God's peacefulness I will keep you in my
> prayers...Was I reading that you wanted to become a priest? I teach
> two grades of religious education, also a lector in just received my
> temporary teaching license all as a C4/C5 quadriplegic.  To the
> court I am nothing but 33% of my net disability income. Respectfully
> in Him, Dan iagatta III

> 12. I will pray for you and for all fathers who are suffering so
> much because of what their wives are doing to them and by the
> failure of the Courts to administer proper justice which would
> enable ALL parents to have equal access to their children and to
> contribute equally to the formation and guidance of these precious
> young children. This is sent, together with the assurance of my
> prayers, with love from, Nanette.

> 13. We are a country that has pledged non-discrimination based on
> race, religion, gender, and sexual orientation. We hope that NCP
> will soon be added to the list. Our thoughts and prayers are with
> John Murtari. Regards, Robin Denison and Sarvy Emo
> http://www.parental-alienation-awareness.com

> 14. I am not in good health, i am blind among many other conditions
> but if i could be there in person for john i would be.  I will be
> there 110% in my heart .  I had a daughter taken from me, i
> discussed this once with john during an incarceration.  my ex-wife's
> family had million's to my lowly income, needless to say who won
> that battle.  now that she is 18 she has come to me...i had
> absolutely NO contact with her for years, none.  you can never make
> up all of those years but we are trying.  again, my thoughts are
> with john. duke

> 15. I am a father at the beginning of this same nightmare. Please
> tell me John Murtari is doing well? If there is anything I can do to
> assit his efforts please contact me. Wish him my best and tell him I
> am there with him in his efforts. Keith M

> 16. I prayed for John Murtari this morning, since he is struggling
> with the conditions he presently finds himself in.  As I did so, I
> found tears welling up in my eyes for the first time in a long time.
> Please pray for John in his hour of need if you are inclined to do
> so, or at least, keep him in your thoughts.  I admire John.  He is a
> good man, a good Dad, trying to do what's right in a world that very
> often doesn't listen to good men, or good Dads...The world needs
> more John Murtari's...We too, shall overcome someday. Ray Blumhorst

> 17. May God resolve this situation quickly! Blessings, Rev. Faridi
> McFree

> 18. Please add my name to the list of supporters...Shared-Parenting
> is the only answer, [Unless one parent is unfit!] For God so loved
> the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever
> believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. (John
> 3:16) Respectfully, Stan R. Bradford

> 18. I want to voice my support for John....please forward on my
> support to John in his stand against the gross discrimination
> withing the family court system.  I support his efforts 110%
> Estranged Father Russ Githens

> 19. I am a former board member of the NJCCR and now part of (Parents
> United for Equal Parenting), I would like to use my credit card for
> the press release and I would also make a $25.00 donation towards
> the $100.00 needed.  I myself have spent time in jail during my 9
> year Custody and Child Support battle and at one point I did not see
> my twins for almost 9 months.  I am also a
> Veteran. nlevy01@hotmail.com

> 20. I am very impressed with john Murtari's sacrifice on behalf of
> all of us. I had no idea that he would carry his struggles this
> far. It is truly admirable for him to go this distance for all of
> us. Aard

> 21. Most fathers want to support their own kids - in their own
> homes.  They want to be full time dads. Women freely break
> agreements not to move away. It happened to me and lots of other
> men. Murtari had his ex take his son across the country. Air fare
> for frequent visits can cost more than child support. All of his
> expenses combined were forcing him to lose contact with his
> child. In other words, the only good thing in his life was taken
> away and replaced with a court-ordered debt...Murtari did the best
> he could and is resisting blatant unfairness. He's not making the
> right decisions, but his entire campaign isn't about support
> payments, it's about being part of his childs life - one thing
> modern women are firmly against. Bethesda paul

> 22. I want to thank Mr. Murtari for his efforts in changing the
> corrupt system.  I too was jailed on trumped up charges of
> harrassment.  I won't go into the details so suffice it to say I've
> lost everything; my home, car, business, friends and family, but
> these things mean nothing to the empty feeling inside without my
> sons.  I still cannot believe this country is in such a state that
> this sort of thing can happen.  Like Mr. Murtari I am a vet (service
> connected disability) and was a good businessman.  I am not sure who
> I am anymore; I am waiting for the court to tell me who they want me
> to be.  I am inspired by his efforts and will pray for him and pray
> for the mothers who choose one sided battles instead of peaceful
> resolution.  Hopefully things will get better soon. sincerely, Troy
> D. White

> 23. How can I help?  I'm in Oneida County.  I can get about $25,
> maybe $50 out to you.  Please let me know.  Keep in
> touch. Please. Tammy Bowman

> 24. We must fight this war for our rights to love our children
> against a powerful system. All of our children will be proud of us
> one day as we struggle to bring dads back into the equation. In
> solidarity - John - prayers from the trenches downunder mate. peter
> burns

> 25. We are forming our own groups in Florida as the situation is
> pretty terrible over here.  I have met a gentlemen named Greg that
> has done some research and has documented all kinds of abuse by
> governmental agencies and court abuse. Could you please check this
> website out?  It is called http://www.releasemykids.com The above
> referred website has 500 cases and I know about 200 cases.  We need
> to get some national attention to this devastating issue in our
> country.  My name is Mari Fernandez

> 26. I knew John planned to do this and I was hoping against hope
> that it would not come to this, but as I read many of the same
> things I have read before, I was brought to tears. I just wish I
> could walk in there and demand they let him go home!...I used to
> wonder if he had lost his mind but over the years, through numerous
> conversations, I have learned he has more sense than I do.  His time
> with his son is more important than any amount of money!! Joanna
> Wright, President, Hope4KidZ, Inc., http://www.hope4kidz.org

> 27. I saw the info regarding John Murtari.  I can appreciate his
> plight, as I have almost exactly the same situation.  I fly 8 times
> / year from NJ to AL to visit my kids, only to have them not show
> up....It is an embarassment to America when the judicial system
> allows children to be used as pawns. The system is broken.  But,
> there may be some hope as more states criminalize interference with
> visitation.  What is most amazing is that judges would take a
> totally different perspective if it was their child, yet simply
> don't see that side, as long as it is someone else's child. It takes
> a very strong conviction to walk the path that Mr. Murtari has
> started, and I will keep him in my prayers, with fingers crossed for
> his success. If there is anything I can do, please let me know, and
> I will be happy to support you. Best regards Rich Bourdon

> 28. I am willing to do anything to help this cause, my son is
> totally disabled and through lies and deception of the court and the
> courts denial of disability he was ordered to child support of over
> $700 per month...It is imperative that the Bradley Amendment be
> revised or rescinded to account for the abuse of calculation of
> child support and the modification of arrearages when support is
> imposed wrongly...John's experience is but one of thousands that are
> a direct result of state court arguments are that they can't modify
> arrearages because they are under federal mandate of the Bradley
> Amendment...Please let me know if there is anything I can do that
> might help. Sheryle Hutter

> 29. As a former Syracusan (SU 1978), now living in London (and
> fighting in the Family Courts in England and Scotland) for the
> return of my daughter who was abducted by her mother 5 years
> ago...Please convey to Juhn my best wishes, and hope he remains safe
> and well. ATB Randy

> 30. What can I do?  This is horrible...Give [John] my love and
> support and let him know I am going to call the media in his
> behalf. Kathy Tilley

> 31. I am a public defender and family law attorney working,
> primarily in Kings County (Brooklyn). I have many recent horror
> stories I can relay. I am so fed up with the injustice that I
> witness daily that I have also formed a an Organization to influence
> public policy and effectuate legislative change. I've created the
> Parents Justice Center.  Stuart Meltzer, Esq. http://
> www.lawnyc.com/org

> 32. Let John know he is in my prayers and that Texas is watching.
> Sincerely, TXDAD

> 33. You have Germanys support.  Kind Regards, Mona

> 34. Please tell Murarti that I admire his persistence. I am trying
> and trying to get presumptive equal parenting legislated in
> Maryland. I am giving his example as how fathers and children are
> badly affected by the current policies in this state.  Clarence
> Maloney

> 35. It's wonderful to know good people with clear minds and good
> hearts are working for what is right. Thank you, Steve

> 36. I have a similar situation to John... I understand and send my
> prayers.  York

> 37. As a father that has custody of my daughter,I offer John all the
> emotional support I can.Unfortunately,since my ex wife has chosen
> not to follow the guidelines of the court and pay child support,I am
> unable to contribute to John other than to say that there are people
> out in the word that understand what he has gone through and what he
> stands for. God be with you John. John Meeks, Oklahoma

> 38. Please call to the attention of John's attorney our company,
> Attorney Client Privilege, LLC.  If there are any services that we
> can provide to him pro bono, I will endeavor to provide them within
> the limitation of our resources.  Our Web site
> (http://www.attyClientPriv.com) sets forth the services that we
> perform for attorneys.  . . .with kind regards, Sean Harrington

> 39. John has my prays and I will send $50 to Keller.  In the
> struggle Carol Hopkins

> 40. Hang in there John, we're pulling for ya. Anthony

> 41. Having been locked as a animal for nothing more than being a
> loving dad to two stolen daughters I can relate and feel the hurtful
> pain of prison . It's better to be defeated on principle than to win
> on lies . in solidarity John - dad4justice

> 42. Be sure, WE ALL are watching John and the updates. Germany?. D.

> 43. Let me know if you need funds for something
> important...Godspeed, Marc Snider

> 44. God's Speed to John, Dean Tong, MSc., Forensic Trial Consultant

> 45. Do you have a fighting fund for John as I'd like to make a small
> donation by Paypal? regards skitt

> 46. I work at a hobby shop that John and his son shopped at here in
> syracuse. I had no idea what the man was going through though! 
> Please tell him that Mike from Walt's says hi and to hang in there! 
> Mike

> 47. We do it. I havn't got a clue why it works, more than
> communication, and concentrating on the benefit of the children with
> our decisions.  Yes shared parenting Works. I think because we set
> our own wants and desires to the side when it come to the kids.SFC
> Ronald Covington

                                       John Murtari
Coordinator                            AKidsRight.Org
jmurtari@AKidsRight.Org                "A Kid's Right to BOTH parents"
Toll Free (877) 635-1968(x-211)        http://www.AKidsRight.Org/
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